I was fortunate enough to go to the premiere of this film a few weeks back.  The film was amazing but the highlight of the night was being 5 feet from Tarantino as he announced the film! He was everything I expected him to be! lol.

So, the movie KICKS ASS! Funny, bloody, and very brutal.  It’s basically the dirty dozen except their isn’t a dozen of them and this isn’t about Allied Forces awaiting D-Day.  This film is about a group of Jews (and one Nazi) who go on a nazi heading huting killing spree.

I assume everyone knows the story or at least the main riff so I’ll go onto what most people who check out my blog want,…spoilers and highlights!

Brad Pitt lives.  He is in the movie for about 40 minutes total.  He was great in his role as Lt Aldo Raine!

Christoph Waltz stole every scene he was in!

Who dies?  (lead roles) Eli Roth, Diane Kruger, Til Schweiger (best performance of his career).

Listen for the Naration of the Til Schweiger character.  It’s Samuel L Jackson.

Harvey Keitel does an uncredited role as the voice of a US captain (?) over the phone.

Hitler gets killed by the basterds.

VERY bloody in some scenes.  The two ladies in front of me at the cinema kept on turning their heads away during the action scenes cause of the gore.

BEST STANDOFF. SCENE. EVER!

It’s a long movie, but doesn’t feel long. (which I take as a sign I enjoyed it)

Tarantino’s best film?  No.  Not at all.  Is it in his top 3?  No.  (I rate 1) Jackie Brown 2) Pulp Fiction 3) Reservoir Dogs).  Was it better than the Kill Bills?  No. But it sure was a lot of fucking fun!  Will def be checking it out again at the cinema when it opens.  (and yes, it was better than Death Proof).

It’s 2018 and John Connor is now an adult fighting for the resistance against the evil Skynet.  I think most people have seen T1 or T3 and everyone on the planet has seen T2 (as they should. One of the best movies ever made), so I don’t need to go into who Connor or Skynet is.  Instead I’ll just nut about the c0-lead character Marcus (played by Sam Worthington).  In 2003 he is about to be put to death.  He donates his body to science.  Wakes up in 2018 not knowing what the hell is going on.  Here’s my thoughts.  (SPOILERS APLENTY)

- The action was good.  I go into a Terminator film for action. And I got it.

-Bale was good as Connor but I never really “felt” he was John Connor.  Both Eddie Furlong (T2) and Nick Stahl (T3) made me feel for the character.  I just didn’t care so much for Connor this time.  Bale screamed a lot.  Maybe that had something to do with it. lol.

-Sam Worthington is the star of the show.  His storyline was the most interesting part of the film.  Good acting gave some emotion to the character also.

-Um, what the fuck was Kate Connor (Brewster) doing in this film?  She did fuck all! All Bryce Dallas Howard did was make her eyes go large! (reminds me of the girl from The Happening).  Such as shame as the Kate character was really built up in T3.

-TERRY CREWES GOT FUCKED OVER BIG TIME!!!!! Nuff said.

-The effects were good.  Don’t know why people are bitching about them.

-Michael Ironside was wasted.

-Music was average at best.  Was hoping for a lot more from Danny Elfman (btw, Brad Fiedels classic Terminator theme pops up twice in the film (or was it 3 times?)

-Common was good in what he had to work with. Anton Yelcher was good as Micheal Behn (I mean Kyle Reese).

-What the fuck was up with Kyle’s mute pal??? Did she have any relevence to the story at all?

-I thought McG did a good job with the directing.  Sorry gang, I can’t jump on the McG hate bandwagon.  I wasn’t a fan of the Charlie’s Angels films but they had some good eye candy and action scenes.  Never saw his other film (Friday night Lights?) either.  But the directing in this was good.  It’s a fucking popcorn film! Every shot doesn’t have to have subtext!

-The script was shit. I’m sorry, but it was shit.  The storyline (what little of it there was) was so basic and cliche. It dragged in parts.  It didn’t feel as though it had 3 acts.  The dialogue was shit.

-I liked the nods to the other films. Reese saying “come with me if you want to live”, Connor saying “It. not him” (as his Mom said to him in T2).  Connor going “I’ll be back”.  You could be mine.  Marcus saying to Connor “The date? What year”. etc

-Having Linda Hamilton’s voice on the audio tapes she recorded for John (at the end of T1) was cool. Sounds like she phone it in a bit though.

-Did James Cameron and Gale Ann Hurd get a created by credit?  I don’t think I saw it.
SPOILERS!!!!

-Arnold pops up around 10 minutes from the end.  By “Arnold” I mean a cgi version of his face slapped onto someone else’s body.  It’s corny, it’s cheesy. But fuck me if it wasn’t the best part of the film!!! The audience erupted when the Terminator tune kicked in  and he appeared.  Worth it just for these 10 seconds.

-Definitely left open for a sequel.  Warners did  change the leaked ending (Connor dies and his skin is peeled and put over Marcus’s (who is a machine) body). Instead, John now gets speared by a Terminator and he is dying.  Marcus gives up his heart (that and his brain are the only parts still human) to save John (thus giving Marcus his second chance).

OVERALL
I enjoyed the hell out of it.  To be honest, it’s a Terminator film. I would have enjoyed it if had starred Zac Efron and directed by Steven Soderburgh.  It has lots of action.  Corny dialogue. And over the top acting.  Exactly what you want from a popcorn film.  I would rate it 4th overall in the series (after T2, T1, then T3).

Thoughts?  So many people I know have already seen this film through advance screenings.  I’m finding that people are 50/50 with it. Be they Trekkies or not.  I’m not totally excited to see it (as I am T:Salvation and Transformers 2) but it does look like fun.  I had NO interest in seeing it until the final trailer came out. That final trailer totally sold me.  Then, I was told that Eric Bana was the villian in it (yah, I really haven’t been following this film) and I’ll watch anything with bana in it. I’ve seen the 10 films prior but own none of them. These are the ones I saw at the cinema. Part IV (enjoyed at the time. Haven’t seen it since). Part V. (HATED IT! And for some reason I saw it twice at the cinema) Part VI. (My favorite one.  Thought it had great action scenes). Part VII. (my pal was keen as hell to see it. I said I’d go if we did it on a school day. Thus, giving us an excuse to traunt.  I enjoyed this film).

I’ve seen the next three a few times.  I liked the 2nd half of part 10 because of the cool darker look and final dog fight.  The first half bored me to tears.

Now, here’s where I get confused.  I’ve seen 8 and 9 a few times but not sure which is which.  I didn’t like these two much.  I hated the stupid scene where Picard shoots the Borg(?) with the tommy gun.  Which one was it data got the “blow job”?  Which one has Farmer Hoggett?

Screw it, I’ll see Star Trek this weekend.  Also confusing, is it a prequel, sequel, reboot?  I thought it was a reboot but I’ve just seen a cinema advertise it as Star Trek XI??

EDIT*******************************************

Ok, I finally saw it.  Yah, I enjoyed it.  Did I think it was a  great film?  No.  But it was fun and that’s all I was after. I would also probably say it was my favorite Star Trek film. (remember though, I’m not a Trekkie and would hardly know one from the other).  Eric Bana was really good as Nero.  Bruce Greenwood was good as Pike, but the star of the show was definitely Zachary Quinto as Spock.  Not because he had the character of Spock down pat, but because he bought a new spark to the role.  Good to see Nimoy play Spock again also.  Also, the effects work on the scenes set in the outer of Earths atmosphere were great!

All in the all the script was very predictable and cliche but the cast pulled it off.  I have to say though, what’s with the STUPID FUCKING SHAKY CAM style still being around! I literally got the shits with the camera work where Pike is trying to convince Kirk to come to the academy that I almost walked out.  No exageration.  It’s that crap.  I’ll be stuffed if I can see how it’s meant to be represented artistically!  Luckily, the rest of the movie wasn’t like it.
Spoilers? Bana gets sucked into a black hole in the end. lol.

Was Winona Ryder doing an extended cameo or is she really only able to get small roles in big films now?  It’s a shame if it’s the latter.  I think she’s one of the best actors of her generation.

Have been looking forward to this for a while.  Although I was never the biggest X-Men fan (my poison was Superman, Batman and Daredevil) I did have a huge collection of “X” comics (was also fond of X-Force).  My favourite character in the series was always Wolverine.  Cliche? Yes.  But he is the most popular character for a reason.  Witty banter, bad attitude, and always going for a brawl (as well as being a role model for short people. lol)

I really enjoyed the first and third X-men films (yep, I can’t jump on the Ratner bandwagon.  It had action and that’s what I want).  But X2 took it to a whole new level.  Great characters backed by a brilliant script.

So, I enjoyed all three X-Men films (even though Cyclops was MAJORLY screwed over) so I was very keen to check out the Wolverine film.

Basic outline.  Follows Wolverine and his brother Victor (aka Sabretooth) through childhood and adulthood (great war montage also).  Later in life they are recruited by Stryker to become part of his team. They join, the team gets a little violent so Wolverine leaves.  6 years later, Sabretooth comes after him.  Thus begins a cat and mouse/revenge film.  The story is very simple.  Virtually no chracter development also. BUT, it has a lot of action and that’s all I want. Deadpool fans are going to go batshit when they see what they did to his origin. After waiting 20 odd years to see Gambit on screen, it was ok.  I don’t think he’ll be as popular as Fox want (ie potential spin off) but it was fun to watch. Ryan Reynolds was good as Wade/Deadpool.

Although I wasn’t sold when I first heard Liev Schreiber was being cast  as Sabretooth ( I thought Tyler Mane was PERFECT in the first film), he pulled it off really well. Danny Huston was really good as Stryker. No one else really stood out in the film for me, but all the performances were decent.

!!!!HUGE SPOILERS!!!!

Patrick Stewart pops up about 5 minutes from the end in an uncredited cameo.

Stay after the credits for alternate endings.

1) Deadpool picking up his head and opening his eyes/http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IgndmyItrg0

2) Wolverine at a bar being asked “do you drink to forget?” he replies “I drink to remember”

Overall, good movie.  2 hours of fun.  Where would I put it in the four films?  (sure to cheese some people off) I would rate it just behind part 2 and ahead of 1 and 3.

p.s It goes with out saying, Jackman was great as the title role, yet again.  He was ripped.

negative points: Some of the CGI claws (bathroom scene at farmers house?) were terrible.

To many characters crammed in. It works, but could have removed one or two.

Bit of character development (not everyone has seen the three X-Men films).

Apparently they shouldn’t have had as much make up on Ryan Reynolds at the end of the film as they did. Example, Woman sitting behind me at the cinema: ” is that the guy with the swords who was a smart ass?”  Her friend: “No, I don’t think it is” Me: (to myself) “ha, ha, ha”

p.p.s No, I didn’t see the work print. I would rather wait and see a finished film and on the big screen.

Ok, this is the brief low down on everything else I’ve seen at the cinema recently.  I’m never going to have time to do huge spiels about them so here it is quickly.

MY BLOODY VALENTINE 3D

A masked killer is wiping out people in a small mining town.  Who are the main suspects?? Who cares?  I saw this for 2 reasons. Gore and 3d.  The gore was really good at the start (ie the hospital) then sporadically throughout (ie the eye pop) but wasn’t as great as I hoped.  The 3d kicked ass and was a lot of fun!  The film ran a bit long for a slasher thriller but the 3d kept you entertained.  Betsy Rue does the best nude scene in a mainstream film I’ve seen in years! You’ll know what I’m talking about when you see it. lol. (trust me, you can’t miss it). Overall, good film.  Not sure if I’d buy it on dvd if it isn’t 3d though.

UNBORN

Horror about a girl (a hyrid of Megan Fox and Jessica Alba) who is having visions of a creepy looking little boy.  Has it got something to do with her Mother (who committed suicide) or maybe her newly found grandmother? Hmm.   I was always going to see it because it was a horror but the poster sure has helped me get to the cinema also. (hey, I have a penis and a heartbeat. Don’t blame me.)

Ok film. Nothing great. Won’t worry about seeing it again.  Why the fuck was Gary Oldman in this?  He normally doesn’t do these sorts of films!

TWILIGHT

Never read the books. Never even heard about it until about 3 months before the film came out.  BUT, it has vampires so I’m checking the thing out! And….I enjoyed it.  I wouldn’t race out to see it again at the cinema but I actually thought it was a fun movie.  Not as “teen” as I thought it was going to be.  It was very “atmospheric” and felt like it’s own little world.  Bit of a twist on the vampire mythos.  Probably wouldn’t buy it, but would check it out again on tv. p.s For anyone that has read the books, is the Indian kid a  werewolf? He was rad.  I wanted him to hook up with Kristin Stewart! lol

More soon.

yeh, I’ve been slack. I have been to the cinema about 20 times in the last 6 weeks so I have a bunch of stuff coming up.   Here’s my thoughts on Watchmen for y’all.

Ok, straight up (this will piss you off) I didn’t get into the comic until the mid 90’s.  I missed the phase when it first came out so  I didn’t read the whole thing until my buddy Greg lent it to me about 15 years ago.  Did I like it? Yes.  Did I think it was the 2nd coming that everyone had said it was? No.  I thought it was to long, a bit wanky, and not enough action.  I did like the alternate universe, most of the characters (comedian was my favorite), and the downbeat ending.  Now, the movie…Did I like it?  Did I think it was the 2nd coming? No.  My thoughts on the film were exactly the same as the comic book.  I was surprised at a few of the scenes left out of the movie though (death of the original Night Owl?) but I’m sure they’ll make the directors cut.  I liked the directing a lot.  The actors were good (always good to see Matt Frewer on the big screen).  Is it worth going into what the story is or does everyone who cares already know it?  Here it is in one line. Superheroes are in exile as the world stands on the edge of a nuclear war where the god like Dr Manhatten is humanities only hope.  Other things I liked.  The music kicked ass.  Malin Ackermans butt was very nice. lol.  Had a good chuckle at Dr Manhattens dick popping up all the time (not literally).  Even though I thought the comic was long I didn’t mind the 2 hour 45 minute run time of the film.  It didn’t seem to drag (maybe a little in middle).  I can’t understand why everyone is raving about the violence???? Other than an alley fight, some dude getting his hands sawed off, a pregnant woman being shot, and Manhatten imploding people it wasn’t bad at all!! (Considering what else is out). I think they may all be just jumping on that good old bandwagon!  Overall, a good flick. Will prob catch it at the cinema a few more times and buy the dvd.

Vince Vaughn and Reese Witherspoon play a couple who refuse to play by the rules.  They do there own thing and have fun doing it.  One of these things includes going away on there own little tropical vacations during Christmas (and telling the family members they are doing charity work).  But this Christmas is different and they are caught out by both couples respective parents.  The result?  The agree to see both sets of parents at each of there homes (both couples are divorced. Welcome to the 21st Century) on Christmas Day.

I gotta admit, I went into this thinking it was going to be a dud. (Why did I see it then? Slow day).  The only reason I even thought of seeing it was because of Vince Vaughn.  The guy can just make a look with his face and I can have tears of laughter.  He didn’t disapoint with Four Christmases.    I literally laughed out loud quite a few times.  The story was corny and predictable but the laughs were there and at the end of the day, I was happy with that.  Witherspoon was just as funny which I didn’t expect.  Then again, I haven’t seen any of her comedy films.  I did see Freeway about a 1000 times and laughed heaps but I think that’s meant to be different humour.

Vaughns parents are played by Robert Duvall (very good in this) and Sissy Spacek (good in the limited time she has on screen).  Witherspoons parents are played by Mary Steenburgen (she will always be Clara Clayton to me) and Jon Voight (man, this guy has been on a roll for the last few years!). Jon Favreau was good as Vaughns brother.

Good film.  Wouldn’t buy it on dvd but would watch it on tv.

Jim Carry, bummed out by his recent divorce has now become somewhat of a recluse. He figures if he doesn’t have to see anyone, then he won’t get hurt.   A chance meeting with an aquaintence allows him to find out about the YES seminar (run by Terence Stamp).  The point of the seminar? To say Yes.  Carrey is singled out by Stamp and makes  a promise to say Yes to everything for a year.  Hilarity ensues.

Some people are saying this is a return to form for Carry, but I’m asking, did he every lose his form?  Granted, his last “comedy” Fun with Dick and Jane, was average at best but it still made a lot of bank and had some chuckles.  He’ll never get another Ace Ventura, or Dumb and Dumber.  They are films of the 90’s and that sort of humour is now gone.  (Don’t get me started on The Mask. I hated that film.  The only good thing about it was it was my introduction to Ms Cameron Diaz).

So, Yes Man has a lot of laughs.  Not as good as his last “typical Carry” flick, Bruce Almighty but still good.  Will I buy it on dvd?  Very likely.  The last half hour of the film dips a bit when the humour dries out but myself and all my pals who saw it with me knew that was going to happen.

Overall, interesting plot point, Carry is funny, the film is chuckleworthy.  Worth checking out. (I’m sorry, I didn’t find the New Zealand guy as funny as everyone else did. )

Seeing as though the stats for the first part of my top ten were so amazing (note: tongue firmly planted in cheek), I won’t go on such a spiel for each film.

(for those who came in late)

1) Rambo

2) The Dark Knight

(on with the feature!)

3) Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

Yeh, I liked it.  I liked it a lot.  Sure, some of it wasn’t great (fridge, tarzan, low key opening titles)  but I can say that about every film.  The good parts out weighed the bad parts by a million times.  And ask yourself this “would you rather this film, or NO Indiana Jones IV at all?” (those who said no film at all are liars).  And don’t even get me started on the dumb schmucks who are jumping on the “George Lucas and Steven Spielberg raped my child hood” bandwagon.  Great film.  It’s not Temple of Doom (that’s right! I prefer Doom to Raiders!)…but what is?

4) Iron Man

Dug the hell out of it.  I thought Downey Jr was an odd choice (going with Hollywood 3 picture deal, 1 every 3 years) as he is older but he was great! The pacing was good.  Jeff Bridges was great (as per normal).  Good effects.  And a great Nick Fury tie tie! Bring on the avengers film!

5) The Clone Wars

I LOVE  Star Wars.  I thought this film had some great action sequences and I enjoyed the new characters ( Ahsoka, Rotta).  Ziro the Hutt was terrible though.  I will give all the haters that.  Worst character in the Star Wars universe.

6) Incredible Hulk

I though Bana and Co gave the characters more heart than Norton and Co, but this was a better film.  Better CGI, better action, more comic book/tv show references, and better cameos for Lou Ferigno and Stan Lee.

7) Taken

Liam Neeson goes bad ass. Kills every person he comes across in a mission to find his daughter.  Think Denzel in Man on Fire.  That’s Neeson in Taken.  Don’t miss it.

8)  Cloverfield

POV Monster movie in New York.  Great marketing campaign.  Sure, the CGI was shot and when I saw it in the cinema I nearly threw up (good old shaky cam) but, damn! What a great film!

9) REC

POV foreign zombie film.  Was it this year?  Anyway, I saw it this year and loved it.  First 10 minutes bored me to tears and almost stopped it.  Glad I didn’t. Very original and scary.  Have yet to see the American remake “Quarantine”.

10) Tropic Thunder

Racist, un PC, hilarious! Ben Stiller and Justin Theroux deliver a classic!  Have to say, I’m finding it more and more funnier on repeated viewings.  Tom Cruise was good but Stiller, Downey Jr, and Black just stole it!

Honorable mentions

Hellboy II, Street Kings,  Bigger. Stronger. Faster, Jumper, Step Brothers, Mirrors, Wall-E, The King of Kong, Confessions of a Superhero, Get Smart,  Saw V, Speed Racer,

Worst films of 2008

The Love Guru.  I didn’t get into Austin Powers but I loved Waynes World.  What the FUCK was this mess! The only time I laughed was at the Waynes World nod in the car! Bad jokes, bad timing, over acting! ARGH!

Diary of the Dead (George…what happened! When I was watching it I was in denial it was a Romero film.  Please do a 6th one! Don’t let this be the end of the series!)

Hancock.  First half I enjoyed.  Then when Theron stepped in it just went to the dumps! I’m a big fan of Will Smith but I’m not sure he read the whole script before signing on.

The Happening.  Not as bad as Lady in the Water (then again, what is?) but it was still crap.  Not even Wahlberg or Leguizamo could save this mess.

My 10 favorite films of the year (you knew it was coming!)

1 and 2

1) Rambo

For over 20 years I’ve been a fan of John Rambo.  And although I don’t hate the 3rd film as much as other bandwagon jumpers, I still felt it was the weakest of the 3.  When I heard Stallone was going to be a part 4 I got very excited! After seeing how brilliantly he wrapped up the Rocky saga (with Rocky Balboa) I had complete faith that he would deliver with Rambo 4. (aka Rambo, aka John Rambo). And guess what?  STALLONE DELIVERED!!!! and then some!  The character, the music cues, the action, the mullet, the bandana, the crossbow! It was all there! It was like Stallone went “tell me what you want in Rambo 4, and I’ll do it”.  That’s how perfect this film is.  Non stop, blow your ass out of the cinema, action.  And that battle  sequence in the last 10 minutes with the .50 calibre? Wow. That’s all I can say.  If you haven’t seen this movie, check it out now!

2) The Dark Knight

Everyone who know’s me, is aware that ever since I was a punk kid, I am THE authority on Batman and Superman. I LOVE Tim Burtons Batman and Batman Returns. I was also a fan of Schumachers Batman Forever.  Batman and Robin may be the worst film ever made (and that broke my heart.  Schwarzenegger in a Batman film! And it’s SHIT!).  So to say I was excited for Batman Begins is an understatement.  Sure enough, I was there first night and I enjoyed it. BUT, I didn’t live it like I thought I would.  I didn’t like the first hour at all.  I watch a Batman film to see Batman, not Bruce Wayne (and no, they are not the same person).  Don’t give me the “that’s how we see Bruce become Batman” argument.  Tim Burton didn’t need an hour to do it.  And why does it take Superman 42 minutes to appear in Richard Donner’s film?  The difference between Donner and Nolan?  Donner did it right!  So, onto the second half…I really enjoyed it.  Bale was perfect for the role.  I actually like the voice he puts on.  The action was good. The tumbler grew on me.  The music grew on me.  Katies Holmes, although very attractive, may have been guilty of being the most miscast actor in a role yet. So, onto Dark Knight.  When the first teaser got released (Nov 2007?) I really liked it.  Minimal, but effective. I was never sold on Ledger as the Joker though.  The only role I liked him in was Monsters Ball. (I haven’t seen Brokeback Mountain yet).  Then when I saw the first pic of him as the Joker, I REALLY liked it.  So he got the look down, but can he do the character. Well, as everyone else who has seen the film knows, the answer to that question is a big YES.  He nailed it! I totally forgot that it was Ledger playing the role.  He was brilliant, and I hope the academy remebers that come nominations.   The action in Dark Knight was better. The directing was a million times over the Begins.  Aaron Eckhart was great as Harvey Dent/Two Face.  Good to see Jim Gordon get some screen time.  I thought Dark Knight was  a great film.  The only two things I didn’t like were his new costume.  That was terrible!  And the sequence with the ferry’s. When ever it cut back to them I was falling asleep and the characters on board were terrible.  But overall, great film and am looking forward to Part 3.

More to come soon.